The Supreme Court rules to restore the monarchy

Source: Washington Post
by Alexandra Petri

“Happy Fourth of July from the nine unelected magistrates of the Supreme Court! Great news: After a lot of clamor for the past 250-odd years, we are bringing back the monarchy! Why should ruling the country in robes, unaccountable to anyone, be solely our province? We have really loved this level of unchecked power that allows us to do whatever we want, vacationing and flying flags willy-nilly until the moment of our deaths, and we felt it might be fun for the country if the president also got to experience this rush. Currently, he’s always looking over his shoulder, worrying that if he breaks the law, he might face consequences. We can’t imagine how stressful that would be! Consequences for your actions? No, thank you!” (07/01/24)